the lengths of time

at this rate,
it's going to take forever.
and i'm going to have to
compromise that forever--
really means never.
i lied when i said that
i can forget.

how many times
must i call, or leave messages,
or
buy you things, or
say things to you that i will
in retrospect look on as
self-induced humiliation?

i can't do anything, but
i will sit on the sidewalk
and foolishly wait for you.